


Suit yourself!

by ralf



Series: Close to Canon [7]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Episode Related, Episode: s01e12 Malec, Gen, Humor, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-02-17
Packaged: 2019-03-20 08:07:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13713504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ralf/pseuds/ralf
Summary: Simon storms into Raphael's study (more like, penthouse) without knocking (crap, he hadknownhe would forget something in his haste) and blurts, “Where do you get your clothes??”[1x12: “I borrowed one of Raphael's suits.” Aha, Simon. Aha.]





	Suit yourself!

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be super short? Like two, three hundred words tops? But it kinda got out of hand. Also, I think now I understand the Saphael Ship because I had so much fun writing this! I tried out a little more personal third-person-narrator in this one, let me know what you think :)  
> ..... and the title, well, I live for crappy puns ;)

Simon storms into Raphael's study (more like, penthouse) without knocking (crap, he had _known_ he would forget something in his haste) and blurts, “Where do you get your clothes??”

Raphael looks up slowly from where he's sitting behind his massive mahogany desk, his brow crunching into a dangerous V, but Simon is a little desperate, okay, this is an emergency. He won't be deterred, not even by the Shut-up-or-you'll-regret-it-brows.

“Who is your tailor? Can I get his number?” Pleading, he should definitely sound more pleading if he wants Raphael to cooperate. “Please, please tell me his number. Or doesn't he have a phone? Does he even have a public shop or is he, like, exclusively in vampire tailoring business, you know, say the code word to get in?”

Raphael doesn't seem amused by that, he seems rather reserved and suddenly a terrible thought comes to Simon. He stares at Raphael accusingly. “You didn't turn a tailor just to have access to new suits, right? That would be kinda...” He gestures with his arm emphatically but it probably looks more like uncoordinated flailing. (Simon is realistic like that.)

Raphael looks offended at that notion, or is that his angry look? It's difficult to tell, the two are very similar, and even though Simon is unsettlingly familiar with both of them he still has problems telling them apart. In any case it's time for some placating, to get that frown off of Raphael's face. Morals aside, he _really_ needs Raphael's help.

“Not that your sense of style is in any way lacking, it is not, it's flawless... but that's no wonder if you have your own personal tailor locked away somewhere in the dungeons,” damn, where did that come from, he didn't mean to say that, “Does he get enough food? Or blood?” Simon blinks, smiling winningly while inwardly despairing at his lack of filter.

Raphael sighs deeply. “Is there a reason you are suddenly so invested in my wardrobe when you never bothered to show consideration for my suit jackets before?”

Simon forces a laugh, awkwardly scratching the back of his head, remembering his early vampire days. “Yeah, well, I've been invited to a wedding and I don't have a suit and since I can't exactly go shopping anymore and Clary was too busy to help me I started searching online but it's not really the same if you can't try it on and I don't want to risk that it doesn't fit, I can't afford that-- How do vampires even earn money? I meant to ask you that because at this rate I'll never get my college degree and I don't want to end on the streets.”

And alright, he's getting sidetracked, but this is really important information for the future of his undead life and he planned to ask anyway someday, so why not right now?! Raphael's face is making a complicated move though that spells trouble in big bold letters and Simon hastens to get back on track.

“Anyway, I remembered that you are always dressed to the nines and so I wondered...” He leaves the sentence hanging, because otherwise he'll start rambling again and it's better for him if he doesn't.

“About my tailor,” Raphael finishes.

“Yes.” Monosyllabic answers, he's got this.

Raphael fixes him with a pinched expression and Simon thinks this is it, he will be thrown out of Raphael's study and he'll have to attend the wedding in his jeans and t-shirt. He really should have just gone with his initial plan of _stealing_ one of Raphael's suits. Better to b eg for forgiveness than to ask for permission and all that. Then again it was very unlikely he would have managed to sneak past Raphael and to his wardrobe, Raphael would have probably heard him or smelled him or whatever and ripped him apart. Was nicking another vampire's clothes officially labeled a crime? He should look into that sometime.

Raphael is still looking at him with some kind of murderous annoyance and Simon wonders if asking about another vampire's tailor is some weird privacy breach he just unwittingly committed. It seems not only his chances of attending this wedding in an appropriate attire are dwindling but also his chances of a continued unharmed existence. Great, just his luck.

He's currently outlining exit routes out of the room in case Raphael launches an attack when Raphael's voice cuts through his semi panicked haze.

“When do you need that suit?”

Simon is so astonished that Raphael is not trying to tear his head off that it takes a moment for the question to register, but when it does he hurriedly checks his watch. “Oh, hm, like... three hours?” He shoots Raphael an apologetic grin that possibly comes closer to a strained grimace.

Raphael rolls his eyes in obvious exasperation.

Simon immediately rushes to his defense. “I only received the invitation yesterday!”

Raphael stares. “Who invites people one day before the ceremony.” It's stated so flatly that Simon is unsure whether that was an actual or a rhetorical question.

“Shadowhunters apparently,” he answers, to be on the safe side.

For a second it looks like Raphael wants to follow up on that, but then he shakes his head, clearly wanting nothing to do with this whole affair. He gets up from his seat and walks around the desk. Simon has half a mind to take cover, but he's fairly sure this isn't Raphael's threatening stance. Mostly because Raphael's threatening is too fast to really see it coming and entails a lot of hissing and deadly glares. Right now Raphael is only giving off his average level of homicidal vibes. Simon is pretty much immune to it by now.

“Follow me,” Raphael says, halfway to the door and Simon scrambles to catch up. All this thinking about homicidal vibes has him a tad uncomfortable though. Who even says 'follow me' all creepily, except for serial killers luring in their naive victims?

Some covert and expertly executed interrogation is in order.

“Are we going to visit the tailor in the dungeons now?” he asks. Then something occurs to him. What if _he_ is now supposed to become Raphael's personal dungeon tailor, as punishment for his impertinent questions? He's not qualified! He can't even _sew!_ Surely Raphael will see reason??

Raphael stops and turns around before they reach the landing, and there's that slight annoyance that never completely leaves his face whenever he's around Simon.

“There is no tailor hidden in the dungeons, Simon. And even if there was, three hours are not nearly enough to get a custom-made suit. I'll lend you one of mine.”

He leads the way down the stairs while Simon indulges in a little victory fist pump that he abruptly cuts short when he hears Raphael huff. He takes two steps at a time until he reaches Raphael's side again.

“Thank you so much, Raphael, I really owe you big time for this. I don't want to think what Clary would have said to me if I'd turned up in my normal clothes, phew, that couldn't have gone well and--”

“There's one condition if I am to borrow you one of my suits,” Raphael interrupts him.

Simon nods attentively, a light grin on his lips. Nothing can ruin his good mood, he just prevented a major scandal from happening at a Shadowhunter wedding with his amazing persuasive powers.

“You keep your mouth shut.”

Oh, that. Easy as pie.

“Yeah sure, okay, no problem, Raphael, anything for,” Raphael sends him a scathing look, “shutting up now.”

He even almost manages to keep quiet until they pass the next floor.

 

 

.

 


End file.
